Tuesday, March 18, 2008


Nits and I were having lunch and she (having just read Eat, Pray, Love) asked me what my word was. You know, that one word that can be used to characterise my life. Well, no prizes for guessing (although I am working on changing this)....my word is "fight". I don't think I've met anyone quite so agro as me. And even when I'm not being agro something in me seems to trigger the agro-ness in other people. Within the space of a month I have been attacked (and I mean seriously attacked) verbally by two people, so that I came out of those encounters quivering, my nerves jangling like plucked guitar strings. (Oh yeah, and I vowed never to speak to these two people again for the rest of my natural life)

One of those fights occured on Election Day (yes, I deliberately left it out of my narrative as I was very upset and I didn't want to give it undue importance or record it for posterity).

My friend Mary (who was present at the attack) suggested I do ho'oponopono in it.

I love you.

I'm sorry.

Please forgive me.

Thank you.

(You gotta repeat those four phrases over and over again, while concentrating on the problem)

I agreed. I didn't feel much like saying these things but I agreed anyways. Anything was better than how awful I felt.

OK, it's been a week and some days since the fight. Today, out of the blue, I get a call from the person who attacked me on Election Day. He apologised. It was very formal but still an apology. After gaping wordlessly for a few minutes, I matched his formality and apologised for any offence on my part.

We parted with mutual civilities and (probably) a desire never to speak to each other again. But it was so freeing. No need to hold any more animosity (though I have to admit, the animosity was waning).

This stuff actually works!

I repeated the phrases when driving. I listened to the audio files I bought from Joe Vitale (which transmits the message subliminally). Basically I flooded my mind with this (and Twin Peaks, let's not forget Twin Peaks).

The premise of ho'oponopono is that we are responsible for everything in our lives (that includes the war in Iraq and the starving hordes) and that if there is disharmony somewhere in the universe, it is because of some programme of the world that we hold, some limitation we have bought into. So you repeat the phrases over and over again, asking for forgiveness for holding that negative belief. This is known as "clearing". When you clear the negative belief in you, it gets cleared in the rest of the world. Or at least the other person you are at loggerheads with. The angrier you get at some perceived wrong or injustice, the more you feed into it. So anger doesn't really solve anything. Not even righteous anger.

This has been my first demonstration of how effective this is.

Oh my.

Still reeling.

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