Wednesday, November 01, 2006

It's a matter of perspective, my dear

It is a truth generally acknowledged that if you have long hair and ask a Malaysian hairdresser to bob it, she will get extremely nervous.

Short hair not nice and what have you.

She tries to talk me out of it. Tells me she will add more layers.

No, I insist, I'm sick of it, cut it off, all off.

And she says, but, but, but...

I stick my chin out mutinously.

She sighs, shrugs and gives in.

I wink at myself in the mirror. This is more like it.

My hair is dry and sad and it wants to die anyway.

So she starts clipping. Gains momentum.

It's all coming off, it's all coming off, oh glory, it's all coming off...

She says: "Your hair very hungrylar...why you no condition?"

I say: "No excuse, just lazy. Just don't care enough."

She says: "Tsk, tsk, tsk."

I smile knowingly at her.

Snip, snip, snip.

And the floor is soon covered with my split ends.

She runs some gel through so the short ends stand at odd angles.

It's supposed to look more citified. Or sophisticated. But it just looks like I couldn't be bothered to comb my short hair.

Oh well. I love my hairdresser. I think I'll make her triple chocolate muffins the next time I see her.

18 comments:

QuillDancer said...

Now I get it. I just got my hair cut by a charming Malaysian lady who removed half as much as I requested, all the while casataging me for letting it get so dry and brittle despite living in a dry, brittle, water forsaken desert.

Jenn said...

You got your hair cut by a charming Malaysian lady? In Vegas? I tell you, these Malaysians, for a small country, they seem to be everywhere!

hot coffee girl said...

I need to see some pictures to be sure I like it. Post them, please. (Or e-mail if you are too shy.)

And surely a Malaysian woman would never cut my hair...but I do have no split ends. And shampoo lasts me like a year. Plenty of white, though. Man, I am getting old.

Jackie said...

Jenn, you didn't say whether or not you LIKED the new do! I had to get several inches of split stuff cut off my hair before we left for our trip - and I hate it! It was just the length that I could do with it what I wanted to...and now it won't do a #%#$*$ thing. Oh, well. It grows.

Jenn said...

HCG: I don't know what you're complaining about - I hate my first white hair when I was four years old - genetic or something...so probably I have a head of white, although it's dyed over, funnily enough my sable head offends my mother more than it does me. Post pictures, hmmm. I have to get Julie's camera, to take it. And Julie is tired and grumpy at the moment from overwork...

Jackie: I love it! Which is not to say that the rest of the world will. You should have seen the anxiety on the fact of my poor hairdresser...and then I asked...so when should I come for my next haircut, if I want to maintain this style, and she said, aiya, long time, one month, two months oni, this style grow long oso nice. Sigh. The things we short haired people have to go through...

QuillDancer said...

Yep, nice Malaysian woman in Vegas. Her husband has been here five years but she only recently arrived. She told me how much he has changed and how she feels like she is living with a stranger.

Jenn said...

Poor thing. Readjustment is tough.

cindra said...

Sounds fun! Sassy and fun...good for you. It's good to have a good relationship with yer hairdresser.

Anonymous said...

short hair eh? Hmmm... that'd look nice :)

Jenn said...

Cindra: Thanks, you're very kind. Next time some one asks me to go and brush my hair (aiya Jenny, so short oso, you cannot keep neat ah?) I'll tell them it's fun and sassy...:-)

Grey: I commend your optimism.

goldennib said...

I'd like to see pictures too. I think you'd look cute with short hair.

You've been a very busy bee. It's good to hear from you again.

Taihae said...

i cant be bothered to pony up for a professional job, so i cut and dye my own. ironically, i always manage to do it much better than the few times i've gone to a stylist. thinkin of going short though, and your post was so persuasive...

Jenn said...

Nessa: Hey! I am busily writing out Christmas cards now. I bugged everyone this morning with requests for addresses. They replied. Asked why. I told them. They think I am efficient. I am efficient. Woo hoo! As for pictures, hmmmmm... OK maybe if I ask real nice, Shi Sho the baby sister will take some of me.

Taihae: Hello. Welcome to my blog. Re: short hair. I definitely recommend it. You wake up. Shake your head. Grooming for the day. Done. As for dying my hair myself, I would, but then I die half the room in the process as well. No, no, I figure I will accept my age. And girth. And short hair.

Just Tom said...

I used to cut my own hair before I met Cindra. I thought I must have been doing a good job, since I, well, attracted Cindra. She cuts my hair now and says that she definitely noticed that I cut my own hair when she met me. And it made her feel sorry for me.

oh. Whatever works I guess.

Just Tom said...

Oh and be sure to drop by Sar's and vote for me in the caption contest. Woohoo! Tom

Jenn said...

Taihae: I just noticed that I spelled dye wrong. I don't know how that escaped me. Naughty Jenny, slap the wrist.

Just Tom: It's a matter of perspective, my dear...:)

A thinker said...

So funny. My hairdresser (a gay British man) kept bemoaning the length of my hair and trying to convince me to cut it short ;)

He had no success.

Jenn said...

I wanna gay hairdresser - no, I wanna gay roomate, like Will and Grace.

OK, I'll settle for my hairdresser - she is lovely.